Big Boy’s Toy Box

I’m a geek. If you’ve been reading Yellow Scene with any regularity over the last decade or so, you might have picked that up. My affinity for the good Star Wars movies, my disdain for the bad ones, my adoration for the Marvel movies (Fantastic Four notwithstanding), my unshakable conviction that Batman is the greatest superhero of all time, and my absolute, incontrovertible certainty that Han. Shot. First. are all clear-and-present smoking gun barrels for my geekery that even the least geeky among us can identify.I

Find out more about LootCrate online www.lootcrate.com for more.

So that’s why, right around the third week of every month, my inner-kid-who-can-recite-the-entire-Green-Lanter-Corps-oath-from-memory gets giddy like an 8-year-old at sundown on the first night of Chanukah.

With apologies to Meredith Wilson, the Wells Fargo wagon is a comin’ down the street for me.

Actually, it’s not a Wells Fargo wagon (but I never miss a chance at a Music Man reference), it’s the USPS truck. But the sentiment remains. Like Ralphie Parker rushing home for his Little Orphan Annie decoder pin (not ring. Yes. Such is the kind of geekery I ascribe to), I rush home from work just to see what’s in the mail.

And when it comes… My Loot Crate is here.

For the uninitiated, Loot Crate is a shoebox filled with stuff.

Really, that’s all it boils down to. It’s just a little box with some stuff in it. But it’s also a little piece of magic that can bring a ray of golden sunshine into the dreary grayness that is adulthood.

A monthly subscription service, each Loot Crate features a different geek-centric or gamer-aimed theme, all packaged in an unassuming black shoebox.

In July and August, I received this little chunk of awesome. July was villains. Some of the things included: A Darth Vader keychain. A Loot-Crate comic exclusive featuring Thanos from Guardians of the Galaxy. Socks with Deadpool on them (okay, more of a chaotic neutral good guy, but I’ll overlook the trespass because they’re DEADPOOL SOCKS, man). A refrigerator magnet with Bowser (from Super Mario Bros.) on it. And the pièce de résistance: A t-shirt emblazoned with a Joker/Loki mashup — Joki.

It’s hard to imagine anything better, but August pulled it off with the “heroes” crate: Lightning bolt shoelace tags. A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action figure and accompanying mask/sunglasses. A Mega-Man car freshener. And the show-stopper: A Loot Crate-exclusive Funko Pop Vinyl figure of Groot from Guardians of the Galaxy with a super special glow hand, people.

Depending on the number of months you pay for up front, the monthly cost ranges from $11.67 to $13.37 per month, plus $6 shipping/handling. And, according to that weird “estimated retail value” math marketers use to create “value,” each crate is worth around $40. Take that for what it’s worth, but honestly, if you’re looking at Loot Crate as a financial investment to replace your IRA, well, you’re completely missing the point. But if you want to give a gift that stands out this holiday season, you could do a lot worse.